Many cats need time to adapt to change. Only after they feel at home will their full personalities bloom. If your newcomer appears shy, be patient. Even the most unfriendly of cats can become more sociable if treated with gentleness and understanding. Cats may be timid or anxious around people because of previous bad experiences. They simply need to be shown that humans can be trusted. On the other hand, some cats are timid by nature and there may be a limit to what you can expect from them. Sometimes our own prejudices about cats dictate a negative outcome: If we expect aloofness and act impatiently, we unwittingly encourage antisocial behavior. Children eager to make friends with a cat may unintentionally antagonize it, picking it up improperly, giving it unwanted hugs or coercing it into play. Animosity or ambivalence shown toward a cat by any member of the household, human or animal, may cause it to retreat socially.
Never force your cat to be close to a person or another animal. This may make the problem worse. Spending periods of quiet time with your cat can help banish his human antipathies — and offer excellent therapy for you. A cat can be a natural sedative, relieving stress and calming nerves. Cats like to sleep next to warm bodies, both those of humans and other cats, especially in cold weather, and most of them love to share a person's bed. The valley created by two people side by side or the enclosure formed by a pair of bent legs is a cozy hollow just perfect for a cat to sleep in.
Grooming and playing are also helpful in bonding with your cat. Setting up a schedule is one of the best ways to make your cat feel secure. Try to feed, groom and play with your cat at about the same time and in the same place every day. Your cat may be quite content when you aren't around; he will probably sleep. But while they're awake, cats need both mental and physical stimulation. Play is a good source of excitement and exercise, as well as an excellent way for you and your cat to interact. Change the toys and games every so often, bringing out different items to spark interest.
